Stalking: what it is and how to recognize it

The term “stalking” derives from the English Stalk, a technical term used in hunting, translatable with “making the mail, hunting, stalking”. But to fully understand the meaning of stalkingit is useful to go beyond simple definition.

What is stalking and how to recognize it

This is not an inappropriate single gesture, but a set of persecutory behaviorrepeated and intrusive, who slowly erod the freedom and serenity of a person. Who suffers stalking He feels constantly observed, deprived of his privacy and security.

It is a form of violence that does not end in a moment, but insinuates itself in daily life, generating a deep state of anguish. To give an idea of the scope of the phenomenon, just think that in the United Kingdom it is estimated that about 2.5 million people suffer stalking every year (Office for National Statistics, 2019).

But therefore, What is stalking In practice? This phenomenon manifests itself through a series of obsessive actions, such as:

• Stalking and stalking: The distressing feeling of being followed in your movements, whether you are going to work, shopping or going out with friends.
• Telephone and digital harassment (cyberstalking): A bombing of calls, messages, emails or comments on social media that invade personal and digital space, making it impossible to find a refuge.
• Threats: Words that entrust fear, sometimes explicit, other times veiled, aimed not only at the person but also to his dearest affections, with the aim of isolating and controlling it.
• Property damage: Vandalism against the car, home or other personal goods, used as a warning or a demonstration of power.
• Sending unwanted gifts: An attempt to maintain a constant and disturbing presence, transforming an apparently harmless gesture into an act of psychological control.

Is stalking a crime? What does the law say

Many people who live this experience wonder if these behaviors are punishable. The answer is a clear and unequivocal yes: lo Stalking is a crime.

In Italy, this form of persecution is recognized and punished by law through theArticle 612-bis of the Criminal Codewhich speaks specifically about ‘persecutory acts’.

So that the stalking crimea single episode is not enough. The law intervenes when the persecutory conduct are repeated and cause in the victim at least one of the following consequences, which can also be documented on a psychological level:

1. A persistent and severe state of anxiety or fearwhich makes daily life an experience of constant tension.
2. A founded fear for one’s own safety Or for that of a loved one, like a family member or partner.
3. There constriction to change your life habitshow to change the journey to go to work, change the phone number or stop attending loved places for fear of meeting the persecutor.

It is essential to know that the law considers aggravating people who increase the severity of the sentence. This happens, for example, if a former partner or spouse (even if separated or divorced) commit to committing the crime, or if the stalking takes place through IT tools, as in the case of cyberstalking.

The psychological profile of the stalker

Analyze the psychological profile of those who commit stalking does not aim to justify their actions, but to shed light on the dysfunctional dynamics that trigger persecution. Understanding these characteristics can help the victim to realize that the problem does not reside in her, but in those who act the behavior. Often, behind the obsession are hidden profound emotional and relational insecurities.

Psychological research has attempted to classify stalking behaviors in different types. One of the best known is that proposed by Mullen and Colleghi (1999), which identifies five main profiles: the ‘refused’ (often an ex-partner), the ‘intimacy seeker’ (which can be moved by solitude), the ‘incompetent suitor’, the ‘restored’ (who seeks revenge for perceived injustice) and the ‘predator’ (which plans an attack).

• The former partner who does not accept the end. It is the most common type. The end of the relationship is experienced as an intolerable abandonment, a deep wound to one’s sense of value. The persecution becomes a desperate attempt to maintain a bond, even if toxic and painful.
• The incompetent suitor. This person lives in a relational imagination in which every signal, even a clear refusal, is distorted and interpreted as an encouragement. He cannot see the reality of the relationship and is convinced of a bond that does not exist.
• The intimacy seeker. It is motivated by the desire to establish an emotional or romantic relationship with the victim, often idealized. This profile is frequently associated with erotomaniac deliro or other forms of psychotic thought, in which the individual erroneously believes that his feelings are reciprocated.
• The resentful. He acts for revenge or revenge, perceiving himself as the victim of an injustice by the persecuted person. His behavior is guided by anger and desire to intimidate or make the victim suffer, often to feed a sense of power or personal justification.
• The predator. He observes and follows the victim in a stealthy and planned way, often as a prelude to a sexual aggression. It is motivated by a desire for control, domination or sexual gratification, and pleasure from terror and vulnerability that manages to inflict.

At the root of these behaviors, a profound fear of loneliness is often found. The other person ceases to be seen as an individual with his own will and becomes an object to possess, a way to try to fill an unbridgeable inner emptiness.

The psychological consequences for the victim

Undergoing stalking is a traumatic experience that leaves deep wounds (Hauch & Elklit, 2023). The psychological impact of stalking It goes far beyond the fear of the moment: wears the trust, self -esteem and the sense of security in the world. The victim is forced to live in a constant state of alert, as if the danger was always around the corner. This chronic hypervigilance to degenerate into real disorders, including:

• Generalized anxiety disorder: A constant and pervasive concern, accompanied by muscle tension, irritability and difficulty in relaxing.
• Post-traumatic stress (DPTS): The mind relives trauma through flashbacks, nightmares and a hypervigilance that leads to avoid any situation, place or person who can remember the persecution.
• Depression: A veil of sadness, loss of interest for the activities that once gave joy, feelings of helplessness and despair that can become totalizing.
• Social isolation: Fear and shame can push to withdraw from social life, moving away from those relationships that could offer support and comfort.

If you recognize yourself in these signs, it is essential that you know one thing: this is a understandable reaction in response to a dangerous situation, the scar of a very twisted type of violence that you can have suffered.

How to defend yourself from stalking: the steps to be taken

If you feel you are a victim of stalking, it is essential to know that there are concrete actions to protect you and resume control of your life. Here are some practical and strategic steps to consider:

• Stop any contact: This is the most difficult step but also the most crucial. Sii categorico/a. Do not reply to messages, calls or any other approach attempt. From a psychological point of view, your every answer, even if of anger, is interpreted by the persecutor as a sign of attention and strengthens its behavior.
• Docume every single episode: keep everything. Do screenshots of messages and emails, notes dates, times, places and detailed descriptions of all harassment or stalking. This collection of tests will be indispensable for a future Stalking report .
• Inform the people you trust: Do not face everything in solitude. Talk to family members, trusted friends or colleagues. Making them aware of the situation not only will give you emotional support, but it will also increase your physical security.
• Evaluate the amount of the commissioner: Before the complaint, there is a prevention measure called ‘warning’. It is a faster procedure in which the Quaestor formally warns the persecutor to stop any harassing behavior.
• Professor or complaint: lawsuits: Remember that it Stalking is a crime . You can present a complaint to the police (police or carabinieri) within 6 months from the last persecutory act. Bring all the tests you collected with you.
• Call the number 1522: Do not hesitate to contact the free anti -violence and stalking number. It is active 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and offers listening, qualified support and orientation on actions to be taken.

Recognize stalking and ask for help: a path to find serenity

The stalking Mare you your sense of freedom and trust in people. Recognize it for what it is – a crime And a profound violation of your person – is the first, a fundamental step to resume breathing. Always remember: you are not alone or alone in this, and the responsibility is not and it will never be yours.

Face the psychological wounds left by stalking It requires time, courage and the right support. A path of therapy can be a safe space where you can develop the trauma, reconstruct the self -esteem piece by piece and finally take back the reins of your life. If you feel that the weight of anxiety and fear has become too large to support, you don’t have to bring it in silence. We are here to help you find the most suitable professional for you: the questionnaire begins to find your online psychologist.