According to recent surveys, in Italy most of the boys between 14 and 17 years old considers being overweight as the most frequent cause of teases and humiliations, while an international investigation reveals that as many as 6 out of 10 girls avoid going to the doctor and/or to play sports because they do not want to show themselves or undress in front of other people; Only 3%, in fact, are believed to be beautiful and, as mentioned above, the largest concern is the weight.
To anguish the girls is above all the size of some parts of the body, e.g. the breast (if too large is considered conspicuous and vulgar, if too small it is inadequate and not very feminine); The male complexes, on the other hand, mainly concern the physical structure as height and presence of muscles, considered virile attributes, while a physical mingherlino or weighted often causes inferiority complexes.
The teenagers in the mirror are seen ugly, fatty and full of defects: On the one hand they would like to be accepted as they are as they hate discrimination and have no prejudices against the different, on the other hand they do everything to approve and equal their peers or the current reference models, such as actors, singers, TV characters with a perfect physique.
An attitude, this, typical of their age and the difficult moment of life and development they are going through, characterized by uncertainty, fears, rebellion and ambivalence between autonomy and safety.
Since childhood there is a tendency to evaluate our image based on two criteria, self -observation and external judgments; All this is misrepresented in puberty, when the comparison with the peers and the comments of others take on a predominant role, coming to obscure and deform one’s real image, already difficult to define at this age as the body is subject to continuous changes.
The condition of psychological discomfort which derives from it can be very strong and affecting daily life, social relationships, on school and/or sports performance. In most cases, fortunately, they are passenger moods, linked to the natural evolutionary phase; Sometimes, however, they can result in deeper disorders, such as eating disorders or dysmorphophobia, a frequently diagnosed disorder around 30 years of age but that has its roots in adolescence, even if it is not always recognized: it is estimated that in Italy it suffers from one to three million people, both men and women (we will see it later).
The causes of the problem of non -liked can be varied, the main ones concern:
- Poor self -esteem (in kids still lack the ability to consider the judgments of others with balance without being conditioned, you do not know their strengths/weakness)
- desire for approval (you want to be similar to the peer group, those who do not adhere to certain aesthetic standards are cut off)
- Comparison with the models proposed by the media (magazines, web and TV spread very precise physical stereotypes but actually unattainable, false or in any case very distant from the real world, instilling the belief for which only the beautiful and Magri can be successful in life or, perhaps, have the right to be loved)
- “Social Mania” (all teenagers use at least one or more social networks, where they expose themselves to “selfies” and, in turn, look at peers; this continuous comparison is a sort of tender implicit to be the most admired).
The teenagers afflicted by complexes risk closing in themselves, becoming grumpy, irritable, aggressive and suffering on a more or less serious level of anxiety and/or depressive symptoms; They can devote a lot of time to the care of their image in order to appear “perfect” (makeup, gym, hairstyle, copy the look of the stars, etc. obsessively) or, in some cases, on the contrary, almost to compensate for their weaknesses they take on arrogant and presumptuous attitudes.
As for parents (but also applies to other reference figures such as teachers, coaches, etc.), they can be useful for suggestions on how to behave and face the discomfort of the children: first of all, it is good to transmit the message that in life has loved and appreciated for how we are “as people” and certainly not for our external appearance, for this it is necessary to give the good example, not reserving too much value for appearances; Then, it is however important not to deny the evidence or trivialize the possible physical imperfectionbut spur them to resize the problem and help them find strategies to live better with the weak points, which we all have (e.g. enhance the best sides). Finally, it would be necessary to “train” them to disappointments and to consider the essential concept that everyone cannot be liked!
As mentioned above, generally these inconveniences take on a marginal role and resolve spontaneously in a short time, with the natural evolution of the subject; In some cases, however, this does not happen and there is a real psychological disorderwhich can concern both teenagers and adults, called dysmorphophobia or bodily disturbing disturbance, recognized as a pathology in all respects over 100 years ago by the German psychopathologist Emil Kraepelin and, later, deepened by the Frenchman Pierre Janet.
It is characterized by a distorted vision of one’s physical appearance And from an exaggerated attention to his own image: the subject is concerned about the whole of his appearance, or for one or more specific defects, often totally imaginary (or, if actually present, he deceives them by fixing himself on a small anomaly until he becomes, in his eyes, a real deformity).
He feels ugly, abnormal, he is afraid he is made fun of and ridiculed, he is convinced that he cannot please anyone, he is ashamed to expose himself in the midst of others believing that his alleged defect is enormous and, all this, becomes for him a obsessive thought who torments him continuously, so much so that he conditioned him in his daily life.
Often, in fact, these individuals feel so anxious and vulnerable that they avoid social situations, are isolated, give up friends or sentimental relationships, for the fear of being criticized, of arousing gossip, etc. (they can also develop, over time, further problems such as real personality disorders, e.g. antisocial and avoidance).
Hours pass to fix in the mirror to find confirmation of their “defective” appearance (e.g. a neo, a wrinkle, the hair, etc.), but also to seek stratagems to hide and/or mitigate imperfection, developing repetitive actions similar to the “rituals” typical of obsessive-compulsive disorder (from which however this problem differs clearly).
Some, however, are not even able to support the sight of their body and, therefore, put in place avoidance mechanismsnot looking at the mirror or on other reflective surfaces, such as showcases.
Often, they constantly seek confirmations at friends and/or family regarding the severity of their physical defect and, the fact that the other minimists, only increases their anxiety, the sense of inadequacy and the feeling of not being understood by anyone.
The causes are still little known, among the mechanisms involved, the existence of an alteration in the translation/processing of visual stimuli that would lead to evaluating their appearance, regardless of the interference of psychological factors, has been hypothesized. This relationship remains, however, to be verified.
Cerebral “imaging” studies have also highlighted activation anomalies in the brain areas in charge of the processing of verbal and non -verbal memory, and defects of transmission of nerve stimuli between these areas and the prefrontal cerebral cortex, similar to those found in obsessive compulsive disorder (which dysmorphophobia has a biological base and that is related to the DOC, even on this front and not only on this front and not only on that clinical events, it is demonstrated by the fact that the disorder tends to recur in multiple members of the same family and in families where one or more people with DOC there are).
From a strictly psychological point of view, they seem to be predisposing poor self -esteem, personal dissatisfaction and trauma relating to “negative” sentimental relationships in adulthood; To underline, also in this case, the more or less decisive role of the current, unreal and exaggerated aesthetic canons, continuously promoted by the media (e.g. extreme thinness, eternal youth, etc.).
As for the Treatment of this disorderthe therapy is always unsuccessful if the approach is exclusively of the surgical/aesthetic type, as it is not the correction of the (presumed) physical defect that solves the problem; Indeed, often the subject will see himself more horrible than before or, at most, he will shift attention to another critical part of the body.
The best results are obtained with a appropriate path of psychotherapypossibly of a cognitive-behavioral type, which seems to be particularly useful to change the distorted perception of oneself, reduce control/ritual behaviors, recover a positive relationship with one’s own image and also to restore a good relationship with others.
Furthermore, often, pharmacological support is also needed: serotonergic antidepressants are effective in reducing symptoms in at least 50% of cases.
