To encourage the development of autonomy and the sense of responsibility, it is good to involve children from an early age in the care of the home and in the management of domestic life
It is in the family (not at school, swimming, dance or football …) that some fundamental skills are acquired for life, such as self -care, one’s own things and spaces, the food style; Cooking, washing, ironing, cleaning … yet sometimes we don’t think about it; or rather, We do not always think about actively teaching these skills to our children.
There are many parents who hardly entrust domestic duties to their children, because they already see them too obaratic between school tasks and extra-school activities, or because they imagine that a great organization will serve, or because the children do not want. But the children do not want to carry out household chores because they were not educated to do so.
They are above all the parents of teenagers who complain about the scarce participation of children in the care of the home, even when it comes to their spaces: they ask for collaboration, and do not get it.
But If a child gets used to, from an early age, to make his contribution to the management of the house (with “small tasks” such as setting the table, help to cook, water the plants, pass the vacuum cleaner, throw the garbage, load the dishwasher …), growing it will do so naturallyjust as you wash your teeth or take a shower.
Which does not mean that he will always carry out these duties willingly, that he will never snort; rather means that sometimes he will snort, but he will do the same what he has to do, because it is his job.
The advantages of domestic collaboration
Entrusting children some domestic responsibilities is important for their future: puts them in a position to become autonomous in self -care, of others and the surrounding space. And it is important for community life: in families in which both parents are increasingly working, it is essential to collaborate, help each other, each contribution to everyone’s well -being.
Furthermore, many tasks stimulate many different types of learning. For example, let’s think about how the table is set. To do it well, a great concentration is required: how many people must be set? Will the forks or spoons be used? Do you need funds or plans dishes? For those children who get distracted easily it can be an extremely useful exercise.
How to divide homework
But how to organize the distribution of domestic tasks? It is very simple: you can draw up a small list of tasks to hang in a clearly visible place, and every week the different tasks will be divided among the family members. The child will check the tasks assigned to him, and then he will have to carry them out continuouslythroughout the week, without abandoning the wave of enthusiasm and then stopping in the absence of time or desire: Costanza is needed to exercise responsibility and commitment.
Obviously there may be exceptions (for example when there is a friend to do with your homework or play), but they must remain such. Sunday will be a day of rest, to also transmit the importance of taking breaks from work.
Duties change with growth
The assigned tasks will evolve on the basis of the age of the child or boy. Let’s take the example of the preparation of meals, an job that many children appreciate. The parent will entrust a small specific task to the 5 or 6 years: cut the fruit or vegetables into small pieces, wash the salad, garnish the croutons; With growth, the space of autonomy will also increaseup to the teenage boy who will look for a new recipe and prepare a dish completely alone. In the middle there are many small intermediate passages to be experienced.
A fundamental transition, transversal to all tasks, is to move on to addiction to adult, so it is the parent who reminds the child to carry out the job entrusted to him, to autonomy, for which It is the child who, increasingly responsible, remembers his assignment to be completed.
The contribution that a child, and then a boy, can give in the family, does not end here: it may happen that parents need help even at other times, or that the boy proposes himself for more demanding jobs, for example cutting the garden grass, in exchange for a tip. It is good to support and encourage these initiatives.
Out of home commissions
Starting from 9-10, then, it would be desirable to add some small commission to the household chores, at least for those who live in a context in which they feel quiet enough: go to the stationery shop to buy school material, from the barber, in the library to take and return books, from the baker to buy bread … they are simple assignments that gratify the child, making him feel great, and help him grow in different areas: Learn to use money, to move in your neighborhood, to relate to others. And in the meantime he acquires self -confidence and self -confidence.
Parents often hesitate to leave these spaces of freedom to their children, because they are afraid: they fear, for example, that someone brings them closer to them and make them evil. The paradox, however, is that children are sometimes more at risk in their room, with the smartphone, than alone on the street. But we still struggle to be aware of it.
It starts as a child
And with younger children, before 5-6 years old? Already from 2-3 years of age you can begin to educate children to domestic collaborationfor example by tidying up the toys together, but paying attention to assigning very specific tasks (“now we put the buildings in their box”), because in front of a room full of scattered objects the child will feel disrevictable and will not know which side to start.
Furthermore, We make sure to offer children the opportunity to imitate ourselves as we clean, sprinkle, cook: We could leave them, for example, a part of the dough that we are working to prepare with us pizzas and biscuits.
To carry out this progressive responsibility of children, some commitment and trust will be sufficient, keeping anxieties and fears in brake. In the end it will be a profit for the whole family: for parents, because they will be helped in household chores; For children, because they will grow up in maturity and autonomy.
