When faced with foods considered fattening, a desire can arise in us that is difficult to control and seems impossible to ignore. In those moments, we risk sabotaging a weight loss journey that, until shortly before the “mistake”, seemed fundamental to us. When we give in to temptation, guilt and a sense of failure often emerge which can make us feel incapable and lacking willpower.
A reassuring food
Precisely in these moments, when we judge ourselves weak or incapable, food can acquire an even deeper meaning and become something else:
- mother’s reassuring cuddle
- favorite pastime
- company in moments of solitude
- gratification after a difficult day
- the caress we haven’t received for a long time
- the sedation of the thoughts that crowd the mind
- anger towards ourselves: “I hate seeing myself eat but I can’t stop, so I hide to do it”, or the sense of frustration that comes from thinking: “I can never do the diet, even when I try”.
What to do if I can’t diet – the first steps to conscious change
Emotional eating, oremotional eating or nervous hungeris the response we give to emotionally charged and stressful situations through uncontrolled and high-calorie eating, even in the absence of hunger. This involves seeking food for cuddles, reassurance, relief from tension, distraction, or pleasure.
Food is this and much more!
We attribute it to food emotional meanings that do not belong to him, and our inner journey can begin from here. This complex and intimate relationship with nutrition often leads us to eat more than necessary and, inevitably, to gain weight, with important repercussions on mental well-being.
In fact, it is common for a person to become involved in the cycle of restriction-disinhibitionmade up of very restrictive low-calorie diets which, after a few days or weeks, lead to binges and loss of control over eating behavior. The result is that the relationship with food can become a real one obsession which, once established, is difficult to abandon.
This often happens to people who suffer from eating disorders such as anorexia, bulimia and binge eating, or who experience other mental health issues such as orthorexia and vigoroxia.
The problem is not misinformation
Many people who want or need to diet, whether to lose weight or for health reasons such as celiac disease, are often well informed about dietary rules and low-calorie plans. However, beyond practical knowledge, understanding and strengthening one’s motivations for embarking on a diet often represents a central element in the path of change.
In most cases, they know what changes they should make to their diet and are aware of the difficulties they may face. However, information alone is often not enough.
Change habits
Even with greater awareness, we often face the same obstacle: the difficulty in changing habits, even when they are harmful. Many people know what they should or should not eat, but they struggle to apply the dietary regime chosen or prescribed by the nutritionist, making the so-called “sustainability” of the food journey difficult.
There is awareness of the need for change, necessary both for the health and well-being of one’s body image. However, the less aware part can push us to look for food even when we don’t really feel hungry.
The phases of the diet
Following a diet leads to different moods, which often follow one another:
- At the beginning it feels great enthusiasmfueled by an often unrealistic goal and the belief that you can reach a certain weight in a specific time;
- Food tables are organised, yes they check strictly control calories, weigh food, eliminate snacks and undertake cardio training sessions with the sole purpose of burning calories;
- As the days pass, if the goal is not achieved, you experience frustration, tiredness and disappointment. A lot goes into the diet expectationssome of which do not only concern eating behavior, but become a catalyst for thoughts such as: “if I eat less, I will lose weight and I will be happier”;
- When the desired result is not achieved, the disappointment: you feel discouraged and tend to gradually abandon the restrictions. The “stray” becomes an opportunity to let go, restoring, even if only for a short time, a feeling of freedom. Thus begins a vicious self-reinforcing cycle.
For this reason, in most cases, it is not enough to treat overweight and obesity just by prescribing a diet.
Does diet make you fat?
Scientific research has highlighted that, in the long term, going on a diet, especially without adequate psychological preparation, can lead to weight gain: it seems paradoxical, but obesity often arises or worsens precisely after attempts to lose weight that do not also take into account the psychological aspects linked to changes in eating habits.
Some studies show that 65% of people who follow a diet regain all the weight they lose within three years. The numbers increase if the diet has been particularly restrictive: only 5% manage to maintain the weight they have achieved.
The first steps for conscious change
For those who want to start working on their relationship with food, it may be useful to follow a short “first steps” checklist:
- Observe your habits: Take note of when, how and why you eat, without judging yourself.
- Set small goals: Choose one change at a time, such as adding one serving of vegetables a day or reducing opportunities for “distracted eating.”
- Be kind to yourself: accept that the path will not be linear and that “mistakes” are part of the change.
- Seek pleasure in food: rediscover the taste and satisfaction of eating, without excessive deprivation.
- Assess your need for support: if you feel that you cannot do it alone, consider turning to a specialist.
These simple steps can help you take the first steps towards a more peaceful and conscious relationship with nutrition.
When to contact a specialist: the role of the professional
It’s not always easy to understand when it’s time to ask for help. Some signs may indicate that the support of a specialist – such as a food psychologist, a nutritionist or a dietician – can be particularly useful:
- Persistent difficulties in managing the relationship with food: when the thought of food or weight becomes central to daily life and limits well-being.
- Repeated cycles of dieting and binge eating: if periods of restriction alternate with episodes of loss of control, resulting in feelings of guilt and frustration.
- Impact on mental and physical health: when your diet negatively affects your mood, self-esteem or general health.
- Presence of symptoms of eating disorders: such as the need to hide what you eat, the use of compensatory behaviors or social isolation.
Turning to a professional does not mean “having failed”, but taking care of yourself in a conscious and responsible way. The therapeutic path can be personalized and integrated, involving different figures to respond to the specific needs of the person.
Practical advice for managing emotional hunger and changing habits
Addressing emotional hunger and changing your eating habits can take time, patience and concrete strategies. Here are some practical tips that can help you along the way:
- Recognize the signs of physical and emotional hunger: learn to distinguish between the real need to eat and the desire to eat to manage emotions such as boredom, anxiety or sadness.
- Keep an eating-emotional diary: Writing down not only what you eat, but also how you feel before and after meals can help you identify critical moments and emotional triggers.
- Practice flexibility: indulge in small pleasures without guilt, avoiding “all or nothing” thinking that often leads to excessive restrictions followed by binges.
- Work on motivation: set realistic and sustainable goals, focusing on general well-being and not just weight.
- Seek support: sharing your journey with trusted people or a professional can make the difference in times of difficulty.
These steps, although simple, can represent a first concrete help for those who want to improve their relationship with food.
Data and numbers: how widespread is the diet phenomenon in Italy?
To better understand how current the topic of diets is, it is useful to look at the most recent data. According to the Nestlé Foundation Observatory 2023, approximately 45% of Italian adults declared that he had followed at least one diet in the last year, while the 30% says he is constantly on a diet or often thinks about starting one.
Despite the commitment, the long-term success rate remains low: according to research published in “Obesity Reviews” (2022), only 20% of people who lose weight with a restrictive diet manage to maintain the result for more than a year. These numbers help us understand how complex the relationship between nutrition, expectations and psychological well-being can be.
Psychology comes to the rescue
How can we learn to “eat with our heads”? THE’intuitive eatingtogether with a work by cognitive restructuringrepresents the path to follow once we have acquired the awareness that we are attributing multiple meanings to food.
The food psychologist is the right professional to accompany the person on a journey of understanding and processing their emotional experiences related to nutrition.
What does a psychologist specializing in nutrition do?
With his intervention, the food psychologist not only deals with identifying the meanings that each of us attributes to food, but also helps:
- to recover the perception of the sense of hunger and satiety;
- to manage incorrect behaviors related to nutrition;
- to change your eating style;
- to work on dysfunctional beliefs to acquire new and healthier habits.
The final goal is not so much to drastically reduce body weight, but to maintain it over time. What really matters is learning to give voice to your weight and weight to your voice!
If you feel that your relationship with food is becoming a source of discomfort or fatigue, you can find support with Evidence Network: our team of psychologists and specialized professionals is ready to accompany you on a personalized path, respectful of your needs and your times. Start the questionnaire and take the first step towards a more peaceful relationship with nutrition.
